Whole
by smilelaughread
Summary: The morning after a transformation. Written for the OTP Bootcamp Challenge at HPFC. Prompt: Carcass


**This was written for Gamma Orionis' OTP Boot Camp Challenge at HPFC. As such, expect 49 more Sirius/Remus-centric drabbles. **

**Sorry, I digress. This drabble was inspired by the prompt "Carcass"**

* * *

The morning dawned quietly, birds and other animals alike silenced to the point where everything was still.

The only other indication that Remus had turned into a werewolf the previous night was a single rabbit's carcass that had been gnawed at and then carelessly thrown away into the thick grass at the edge of the forest. No one had seen anything, other than Remus and the other Marauders, footprints had been covered and disguised, and precautions had been taken so that the wolf could run around in the forested area behind the Shrieking Shack without risk of injuring anyone or discovery.

But Sirius wasn't worrying about such things.

Not when there was a mass of quivering Remus on the floor, a stark contrast to the all-powerful wolf he'd been just hours ago. He lay shivering, nude, and all but dead to the world. After the night before, Sirius didn't blame him for passing out from exhaustion. It had been a particularly painful transformation, and that was saying a lot.

Remus had once described the pain to Sirius, reinforcing his hypothesis that Remus was the strongest person he knew.

Apparently, the transformation to the werewolf form didn't hurt for long; a tingling and stretching, then the chemical change in the brain that changed it to the wolf's. He was, after that, less sensitive to pain, and it hurt very little. According to Remus, it was the change back that made him feel as though he were dying every single time. He said it was a terrible feeling of bones grinding on bones, fur receeding into skin, and consciousness reasserting itself. It was the guilt of clawing his best friends coming back to him, the knowledge that he'd had the blood of some animal dripping down his fangs, and the memory of being a monstrous beast that hurt, also.

The headache was located just behind the eyebrows, said Remus. But the pain of it - which rivaled, supposedly, that of a migraine - was nothing compared to everything else.

There was tension in all the joints, a throbbing and tenderness in every bit of flesh, and an immense pressure in every bone. It had been stretched and then pushed in on itself twice in one night, and Sirius supposed that hurt a great deal. Not to mention that the full moon lasted for three nights, the pain growing exponentially with each passing day.

Sirius always grew close to tears when he thought about how young Remus had been during his first transformation. He'd been a child, tiny, and had never felt pain like it ever before. It seemed terrible, to Sirius. Especially if, after all those years, Remus still hadn't gotten used to the transformation.

Sirius, tired as he was, shook himself to keep up his watch of Remus.

Sirius counted in his head, trying to keep himself awake. It wouldn't do for Remus to wake up alone. He made it up to six-hundred fifty-nine before any movement occurred.

As Remus began to stir, Sirius rushed forward to prop him up, slightly, so that his hands could have access to Remus' back. Remus sagged against the wall, half-sitting up and half-leaning on Sirius when he began.

He kneaded and pushed at Remus' back, trying to releive the pain and make it easier on Remus. Sirius' own muscles and back were screaming after the exertion of the night before, begging for a massage, but in his mind, Remus came first.

He kept the massage light but extensive, down to the lower back and up to Remus' scraggly hair. Groans escaped the half-sleeping boy, and Sirius pressed a soft kiss to the nape of his neck.

There were other times when he would do these things to Remus, but most times he had other reasons for it. Almost never as serious as this.

In that moment, it was not sexual in the least, but done with the worry and care of a friend. It was done with the amorousness that came from a lover, the attentiveness of two people who carried close bonds.

When Remus sagged back into Sirius' arms, he accommodated the other boy eagerly. One arm wrapped around Remus, Sirius petted Remus' hair with his free hand.

"Shh," he whispered into the darkness of the Shack. "It'll be okay, Moony. I love you. Shh..."

As the sun rose, outside the Shack, two boys who shared more than just a dorm room sat in absolute silence, letting the world go on. They sat in the arms of their most beloved, trying to become whole once again.


End file.
